Ode to Virtues

Originally published in nthWORD, No. 3

Patience is a girl
With pigtails you hated
Back in high school,
Always asking questions
When you couldn’t wait
For the bell to ring.
Honesty, a policy
Discontinued the night
You missed curfew
By two hours, had to wear
A turtleneck in July,
Which came in handy
When that fat nun, Prudence,
Would whack the back
Of your neck for no reason.
Charity calls up empty
Collection baskets, a woman
Gray-gummed, extending
Her cup, eyes closed
So she won’t see you
Pretending to pat
Your pockets for change.
Hope is a dodo bird;
She squawks in your ear:
He’s in a better place now
Then flutters away
To enable Faith, who’s blind
And all corn-syrup smiles
Without sustenance like
Freeze-dried ice cream
Made for astronauts.
And Chastity—
Wasn’t she that stripper
Who used to dance
Out by the airport?